they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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