Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize