Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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