yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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