i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I take back everything I said about communal showers
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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