don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
