my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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