PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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