I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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