umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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