So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
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