So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
