I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
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