I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
