I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
