clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
