whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Randomize
