Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
