how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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