I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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