I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
