Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize