I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
