real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
id be glad to
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
