my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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