hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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