so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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