She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
