the new term for farting is butt boxing.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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