You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
