She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Randomize
