Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
