Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
