You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
