next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
FUCK WHALES
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
