girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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