Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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