Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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