im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
