I feel like I'm in dance class right now
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
