Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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