Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
