some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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