oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Four minutes until I can fart!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Randomize
