I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
