Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
