So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Randomize
