Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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