Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I think my vagina is haunted
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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