quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize